Professor in a Hole


Suite No. 3, Movement Eleven:

 

 

 

 

 

ADVENTURES IN THE ENCHANTED FOREST (PART ELEVEN)

 

 

 

Punk Troll

 

 

 

 

   The troll sometimes enjoyed hiking down from the high mountain peaks to the lower foothills just to see how the trees and flowers and bushes were doing--even though he had to leave the protection of the mountain's Spirit of Place. That morning, the troll had found many red berries and had decided to dye a tuft of hair on the top of his head to disguise himself. "I might be mistaken for a punk rock star," the troll chuckled to himself.
  Suddenly he came upon a man peeking out from a hole in the ground. Startled, the man blurted out, "Good Lord! Are you a demon? Stay away from me! Stay away!"
  "No, no, of course not! I know I might be mistaken for one, especially right now, so forgive me if I have startled you. If you don't mind me asking, why are you hiding in this hole?"
  "The king has opened demonic portals and unleashed hordes of demons into our realm. I can't believe I just said that! I am a professor at the local university. I am a rational man. I don't believe in demons--or at least I never did before now," the professor sighed. "Now, I can't deny their existence. The demons are pure malice in every imaginable way. They can get into your body and into your head and cause terrible harm to you physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.  They horrify me! That's why I'm hiding out here in this hole. I'm not the only one hiding, though, believe me! Many people have escaped from the urban centers and are hiding in holes out here. The king was targeting 'woke' professors and trying to get us fired. I believe that's why demons started tormenting me. To the king, teachers are nothing but radical left-wing lunatics who spend all day laughing at him. The king really just wants to eliminate education. He wants us all to remain ignorant, so he goes after teachers. I probably don't even have a job anymore since I've been hiding out here for a while. I lost my cell phone, and I didn't have a chance to notify anyone as I was escaping. I'm sure they will replace me with a teacher who is absolutely loyal to the king."
  The troll replied sympathetically, "I'm very sorry for your plight, sir. I have never encountered a demon before, so unfortunately I don't know how I can help you."
  "I don't know how you can help me either," the professor lamented. "But if you encounter someone along the trail who has figured out how to ward them off, please come back and let me know. I would appreciate that very much."
  "Of course, I will do whatever I can to get you out of this hole," the troll replied.

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Knight in a Hole

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   As the troll continued hiking, he soon came upon a knight in a hole, who screamed, "Oh, my God, another demon!"
  "No, no, please calm down. I may look like a demon, but I am a knight like you! A Knight of Wands, believe it or not. They call me 'Troll.'"
  "Oh, I have heard of you. You are a great warrior, from what I understand. Pardon me, but I had no idea what you look like."
  "I get that a lot. I guess I shouldn't have dyed my hair red this morning. I was just trying to disguise myself because the king's secret police are after me."
  "Yeah, the king is trying to jail everyone who still believes in the rule of law."
  "I disobeyed an unlawful order, so the king's henchmen are after me," the troll replied.
  "Yeah, I did too, so I guess we're in the same predicament, but I have to admit that I've never encountered demons before."
  "I haven't encountered any demons yet, fortunately," the troll replied.
  "Demons are hideous, but you can't always see them. Most of the time, they remain invisible. Even if they are invisible, they can poke you and prod you and punch you and hold you down and paralyze you and shake you so violently that you believe that they are trying to kill you. Sometimes they just pound on a wall or something or screech. They are powerful enough to kill us, but I think they feed on our fear, so it benefits them more to keep us alive. I am, however, a bit worried that the king at some point will order them to kill us. I doubt that they would hesitate to follow that order!"
  "Yikes! We have to do something, " the troll responded. "I am searching for someone who knows how to ward off the demons. Would you like to join me?"
  "I am afraid that I going to have to politely decline," the knight in the hole responded. "How can you fight an enemy that you can't even see?"

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Demon Sitting Nearby

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   "Good question. I have no idea, " the troll responded.
  "One night I woke up to find a demon sitting next to me, which nearly made me jump out of my skin. I think I would rather not see the demons even though we are more vulnerable when they are invisible. Now matter what, visible or invisible, you can't kill them. They are spirits from another dimension."
  "That's why we need to find out how to ward them off or to banish them," the troll responded.
  "Good luck," the knight responded as he crawled back into his hole.

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Fool in a Hole

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   Soon the troll encountered a fool peaking out of a hole. The fool asked the troll, "Would you like to hear a joke?"
  "I'm afraid I don't have time. I am on an important mission. Thanks for offering, though," the troll replied.
  "You are a demon, aren't you? You don't act like a demon, though. By now, a demon would have shaken me violently or held me down or filled me with negative thoughts and emotions or tried to put out my inner light," the fool complained.
  "I'm afraid I'm just a troll. I'm actually also a Knight of Wands, just without the armor right now."
  "Oh, that's why knights are so intimidating, I guess. Are all knights trolls?"
  "No, I'm the only one as far as I know. By the way, why are you out here? Don't fools amuse kings and queens?"
  "After the king opened many demonic portals, he no longer felt like laughing or being amused. He detested my humor so much, probably because I told the truth, that he kicked me out of the castle and told me not to come back, so now I'm out here hiding from demons. I guess autocrats don't like humor, especially humor directed at them. Sometimes I experiment to see if the demons will respond to my humor. I am trying to find a way to ward them off, without any success so far."
  "What a coincidence! I am searching for someone who can show me how to ward off the demons. At this point, all we can do is wish each other luck," the troll replied.
  "Good luck," the fool replied as he crawled back into his hole. For some reason, the troll laughed as he strolled away. He hoped that a demon hadn't taken over his mind.

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Faery Hiding from Dark Forces

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   Soon the troll came upon a faery hiding in a hollow tree trunk. "Good faery, are you hiding from demons too?" the troll inquired.
  "Usually I try to make children feel happy, but those demons are so mean to me that I don't want to leave my home! Are you by any chance one of those horrid demons?" the faery asked.
  "No, no. Actually I'm an alien from another planet. Reptilian aliens kidnapped me from my home planet and forced me into servitude, but I escaped from them. Now I'm a Knight of Wands on the run. The king is after me," the troll replied. "I'm looking for someone who can show me how to ward off the demons. You don't happen to know anyone, do you?"
  "No, unfortunately I don't, but I hope you find out soon! I hate those nasty demons--and I can't make children happy if I am feeling full of hatred and fear. Good luck!" the faery blurted out.
  "Same to you, good faery!" the troll exclaimed as he waved and continued on the path.

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Child Hiding from Dark Forces

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   Soon the troll encountered a sad child in a hole. "Dear child, where are your parents?"
  "My parents were kidnapped off the street by those ICY soldiers or policemen, or whatever they are. All I know is that they deported my mom and dad. I don't know if I'll ever see them again. Then the demons came and started pinching me and shaking me and slapping me and howling at me, so I kept running until I found this hole. Please don't leave me! You seem to be very kind, unlike all those other demons."
  "Don't give up hope. I am going to find a way to ward off the demons for us. Then I will come right back for you."
  "Thank you. You're such a nice demon. I hope you come back really soon."
  "Don't worry. I'll be back as soon as I can. I haven't failed anyone yet," the troll assured him.

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Woman Hiding from Demons

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   Soon the troll encountered a woman in a hole. "Good lady, why are you out here alone?"
  "They killed my husband with a drone strike. I'm not even sure why. He did criticize the king once, but is that enough of a reason to kill him? Then the demons started attacking me. I thought at first that the demons were a manifestation of my grief, but they were so malicious. I soon realized that I needed to get out of there to keep from losing my mind."
  The troll replied, "That's terrible! My deepest sympathies. These are very dark times. I am searching for a way to ward off the demons. I'll be back as soon as I find out. By the way, there's a child in a hole just down the way. Maybe you can comfort each other until I return."
  "Thank you," the woman sighed. "I will do that. You're the kindest demon I've ever encountered."
  "Thanks, I appreciate that," the troll chuckled. "That's the best compliment I've heard all day."

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Cowboy in a Hole

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   Soon the troll encountered a cowboy in a hole. The troll asked him, "Are you escaping demons too?"
  The cowboy replied, "You ain't one of them demons, are you? They're horrifying hombres, but you don't seem so scary. Tell the truth now." The cowboy pulled out his six-shooter.
  "No, no, no, I ain't no demon. I'm just a troll who happens to resemble a demon. I don't wish to harm you or anyone else, my friend."
  "All right then," the cowboy replied as he holstered his gun. "A man's got to be careful nowadays. I've always survived alone. I take off my boots wherever I pitch my tent. But no one has ever outshot or outwitted me yet, but those demons are somethun' ain't they? Them demons can disappear but still torment the hell out of a man, or bring hell into a man, if that makes any sense. They don't die when I shoot 'em. They just howl and laugh at me. I can't fight 'em, I can't kill 'en, and they won't even drink my hard liquor. What can a cowboy do in such a sichiation?"
  "Ain't nothing you can do, far as I can tell, but I am searching for someone who can help us ward them off. I've heard tales of people who can keep demons at bay or even send them back to their own dimension."
  "Well, good luck to you, son. We need someone right now who can help us out of this thorny predicament. I hope you find him or her, as the case may be."
  "By the way, there's a woman and a boy in a hole just up the way. Maybe you can go and offer them some solace," the troll responded.
  "Thanks, friend. Will do."

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Cop in a Hole

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   Eventually the troll encountered a policeman in a hole. "Hello, officer. I just want to inform you that I'm not a demon, though I might resemble one. I'm a troll. Just out of curiosity, how did you end up out in this hole? I've never seen a police officer in the enchanted forest before."
  "It's a good thing you can talk, buddy. You definitely look like a demon, but demons don't talk--they just torment." The policeman sighed, "It' a long story, but since you asked, I'll tell you. I arrested one of those ICY jerks because he was brutalizing a woman. He pulled her hair and threw her to the ground and punched her in the face several times before he handcuffed her. He wore a mask and didn't have any identification and couldn't present a warrant. He could have just been a random psycho who put on a uniform and just wanted to brutalize people. I wanted to make a point, so I threw the idiot on the ground and handcuffed him and arrested him. I serve the public with honor, and I arrest criminals who assault people, so I took him to jail and had him locked up."
  "That took a lot of courage! Thank you for your service, officer," the troll replied. "You might not believe this, but I am actually a knight. I disobeyed an unlawful order and the king sent his henchmen to execute me for sedition, so I escaped out here."
  "Well, now the king's henchmen are after me too. The king doesn't want law and order. He just wants to flex his muscles and have his thugs and murderers terrorize people. And now he's released demons to terrorize the people too. Too bad I can't arrest those creepy monsters. Most of the time they're invisible."
  "I know," the troll responded. "I'm searching for someone who can show me how to ward them off or banish them, so far without success. You can join me, or if you prefer, you can help protect a cowboy and a woman and a child who are in hole down the way. We've got to work together now. I have a theory that demons only attack individuals, not groups."
  "Yeah, I think I'll go help those people and see if your theory is correct. Thank you and good luck."

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Soldier in a Hole

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   Soon the troll found a soldier in a hole. "Before you shoot me, I just want you to know that I'm a troll, not a demon, and like you I serve the realm. I am a Knight of Wands. The king's henchmen are hunting me for refusing to follow an unlawful order. My friends call me 'Troll.' How did you manage to end up out here?"
  "Well, I ended up following an illegal order and killed innocent people. Then they claimed that following orders was not an excuse. In fact, in the past, soldiers who followed illegal orders and killed innocent people were executed for committing murder. When I heard that, I deserted from the army and escaped out here," the soldier explained. "Then demons started to torment me, and I jumped into this hole to get away from them. So far they haven't found me. Good thing because I'm tormented enough as it is."
  "I'm sorry you had to go through that. I'm sure you are an honorable soldier who found himself in an impossible situation," the troll blurted out. "And I'm sure no one was out there to tell you not to obey the order."
  "That's true," the soldier sighed, "but you were in the same situation, and you didn't obey the order."
  "As a knight, I've studied the law and knew that it was illegal," the troll responded, "but soldiers in this realm are not always taught the law."
  "Unfortunately true," the soldier responded.
  "Look," the troll replied. "A policeman, a cowboy, a woman, and a child are all in a hole down the way. Maybe you should join them. You can defend each other. That might help you feel better. I'm going to continue searching for someone who can show me how to banish the demons or ward them off."
  "Good luck," the soldier responded.

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Eagle in a Hole

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   Soon the troll encountered a bald eagle in a hole. The troll had learned eagle language on another planet, so he asked the eagle a question, "Greetings, great eagle," the troll stated, "May I ask why you are here when you can fly high above the demons and all the problems that plague this realm?"
  "Demons can fly too," the eagle replied. "They hound me wherever I go. My theory is that the demons are trying to reduce the great symbol of this realm to a pathetic emblem of cowardice because the king wants to turn a once-great democracy into a fascist state. How did you learn my language anyway?"
  "I am an alien from another planet," the troll replied. "I have learned the language of many different species as I have traveled through the galaxy. Anyway, you can reestablish your reputation as a great symbol of the realm--at least for a few people who are in a hole down the way--if you help to protect them. We have to work together for the common good. Isn't that what democracy is all about?"
  "Do they speak 'eagle' like you?" the eagle asked.
  "No, but I'm sure they would appreciate any help you can provide."
  "Okay, I'll head over there," the eagle replied.
  "Great! Thank you!" the troll exclaimed.

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Demons Unable to Touch a Fool

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   Soon the troll came upon an amazing sight: a fool was walking on the path toward him and numerous demons kept trying to terrorize him, but the fool seemed unaffected. He just kept walking confidently and happily down the path.
  "Kind sir, how are you able to remain unaffected by the demons--if you don't mind me asking?" the troll inquired.
  "The four Archangels of the Elements of the Wise are protecting me," the fool replied.

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Archangel Michael

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   "Please tell me more!" the troll encouraged the fool.
  "You can keep the demons at bay or banish them if you work with Archangels Raphael, Michael, Gabriel, and Auriel, who are far more powerful than demons, even more powerful than the devil himself," the fool claimed. "Archangel Michael, 'Like unto God', as you might recall, vanquished Satan and cast him out of heaven. The Archangels and their orders of Angels, if you establish a rapport with them, can protect you from these horrible demons."

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Helpful Angel

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   The troll asked, "But how do you know this?"
  "I can see into the spirit realms, and one day I had a vision of a golden balanced cross with an Angel at each end of the cross," the fool replied. "And one day soon after I found a description of a banishing ritual and an invoking ritual with the exact same symbolism, except that I discovered that the Angels at each end of the balanced cross are actually the Archangels Raphael, Michael, Gabriel, and Auriel. I invoked them and felt a profound sense of unity and eternity and also experienced their amazing power and intelligence. In fact, they are so powerful and intelligent that I felt like an amoeba in comparison. Even though they are at a much higher spiritual frequency and intelligence, they for some reason worked with me to keep the demons away. I know that people are more likely to believe in demons than they are to believe in Angels, but I assure you, angelic beings can help us climb out of a hole--free of all torment and negativity."
  The troll replied, "I know a lot of people who are currently in a hole hiding from demons. Can we help them? "
  The fool responded, "If they can believe in Angels as much as they believe in demons, I'm pretty sure that we can. We can work with the Archangels to neutralize dark forces--so far they have never failed me."
  "Well, It's worth a try!" the troll exclaimed.